I used to worry what other people thought of me. Well, in all honesty, I still do, but not as much as a few years ago. It’s a process.
Spending time wondering what other people think can use up a lot of energy and precious time. And in the end, can we even really know what someone else is thinking?
Have you ever heard the saying “It’s none of your business what other people think of you”? It sounds a bit harsh, but think about it for a minute and you’ll see that it makes perfect sense.
We can’t control what other people think of us just as other people can’t control what we think of them. We can’t get into the mind of another to find out why they think the way they do. It’s challenging enough to figure out why we think how we do. And also, we’re filtering what we think they’re thinking through our own filters. So what we’re really getting is what we think of ourselves, but putting the blame on another person.
The only one that cares what other people are thinking is the ego. It has its pride, you know.
The truth of who we are knows. It knows we are love incarnate. It knows being human can have its moments and it knows we’re doing the best we can with what we’ve been given. By that I mean, we each have our life experiences that shape our beliefs and consequently how we live our lives.
It is your business to tend to yourself. How do you feel about yourself? How do you feel in your life? These are the questions that carry weight, that are worth exploring.
How you feel about yourself emanates into the world around you. In the approximate words of Byron Katie, are you at war with yourself? Do you nag yourself to death? Do you constantly criticize or find things wrong with yourself? If so, this isn’t exactly living – it’s more like existing in hell and you do deserve better.
Since how you think of yourself matters, becoming consciously aware of your thoughts is a place to start and a good one at that.
Observe your day-to-day thoughts without judging them. Write them down. When you have a collection, look them over and see if you can identify a theme? Are your thoughts loving and compassionate, or are they cynical and criticizing?
Once you have an awareness around your thoughts you can decide which ones you want to expand upon and which ones can either be reframed or let go of.
When you become aware of your own thoughts, wondering what other people think of you becomes less important. Living from conscious awareness is grounded in the heart where existence is less about the ego and more about the truth of our inner wisdom.
As you go through the process of tending to yourself, when you do have occasion to wonder what other people think of you, from the filter of your own mind, you may find their thoughts very uplifting.