I had someone tell me recently that inner child work is considered woo-woo. That came as a bit of a surprise because it’s been so helpful to me personally.
Our inner child holds a lifetime of information and we can benefit from being in relationship with her. When you get triggered, chances are your inner child is reacting to a memory she’s holding onto.
Our subconscious minds are a storehouse of information. Information goes in and stays there. If you ever want to know anything about yourself, simply get quiet, ask your question and your subconscious will provide you with the answer. Maybe not in that immediate moment and you may not like the response, but it will tell you.
When you get triggered – meaning get angry, protective or feeling like a victim, or react in a way that may feel irrational – chances are it’s your inner child protecting you. But, and this is a big but, you don’t need this inner child to protect you any longer.
When we were little, from conception to around 6 (and possibly older), our brains weren’t designed to process information so we stored it until the time came when we’d be able to make sense of things. As an adult, when we get triggered, it’s our inner child, that aspect of ourselves that rests in our subconscious memory, getting our attention by letting us know we’re still holding onto old information.
Our job now, as adults, is to recognize these signals and basically decode them.
I started a practice a while ago now, where each morning I talk to my inner child. I let her know she is safe and she is loved. One time when I asked her what she needed from me, she told me she needed a big hug, so each morning she also gets a heartfelt hug.
Why do I do this? Because as I’ve established a relationship with my inner child, she’s more willing to let me know the origin of my triggers. She isn’t afraid of me, thinking I’m just another adult who wants something from her or is going to hurt her. She knows I genuinely love her and she can trust me.
Our inner child doesn’t want the burdens that have been laid upon her. She’s a child who wants to play and have fun. In the end, I think that’s what we adults want too.
Being able to get to the origin of our triggers through our inner child is a form of self-care. It’s a demonstration that we wish to evolve from letting our subconscious mind rule us to being consciously aware and step more fully into our compassionate, mature, fun-loving selves.
If you haven’t established a relationship with your inner child, she’s waiting for you.